mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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