Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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