i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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