I think my vagina is haunted
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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