Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
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