if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
