Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
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