dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
