apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
