so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
