I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
