Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
