whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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