Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Holy sore nipples Batman
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
