Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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