They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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