At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize