sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize