In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Randomize