So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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