I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
