bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
