i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
