oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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