Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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