no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize