she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
