Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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