so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
