Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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