belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
