How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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