I want to walk on stilts...naked
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Barsexuality is the new black.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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