just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
3pm strippers are depressing
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Randomize
