Three words: puerto rican gang bang
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
