Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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