I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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