Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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