I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
