Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
