Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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