Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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