He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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