erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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