arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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