im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
