wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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