either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
