In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
operation have a gay friend backfired
it's like iHOP with fire
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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