also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
