Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
