There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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